By Shelley-Ann Gordon, Jan 12, 2008

Who sees a movie over a hundred times but the obsessed and loony? I’m neither. Okay, maybe a little obsessed. But hey, I love Stallone. Come to think of it, I did meet a guy in college who watched The Joy Luck Club 232 times. I gave him that look. I felt guilty because I should’ve understood. But, I just patted him on the back and said, “It must be a hell of a lot better than any Stallone movie.”

Your mother used to give me that look every time she came home and I was pressed against the couch in my tighty whities, a Corona in my hand and the speakers blasting my favorite scene at the beginning of the movie where Stallone catches the bad guy. Can you imagine, then, the look on her face when I told her there was a Stallonathon at the local theater?

“Joe, you really do love that movie?” she asked.

“Not more than you,” I smiled.

“Alright, I’ll go. This is crazy,” she laughed. “Wait ’til I tell the girls at work how I’m spending my weekend. On second thought, maybe I’ll keep it to myself.”

“That’s a good idea. One may call begging for your ticket and maybe for me,” I said dodging a slap from her heavy hands.

So, she came to sit with me in the nearly empty theater, and just before my favorite scene, I leaned over to gently whisper in her ear, “I love you.”

“Shh,” she said squeezing my hand. “You’ll miss your favorite scene.”

And that’s when I knew she was the one, son. I know. I know. You’re only a baby, and you’ll probably hear this story a 103 more times. But if you’re ever worried if that special girl is the one, just take her to see Demolition Man.

Shelley-Ann Gordon is a former middle school teacher and she’s now working towards her MFA in Creative Writing at Chatham University. She is stoked that her first publication is being featured in decomP.